27 May 2010
Would you..?
Well, it had been more than a mth since we broke up. I had never been happy since then. This is also something which I like to say,(Baby won’t you tell me why, there’s no sadness in your eyes? I don’t wanna say goodbye, to you. Love is one big illusion, I should try to forget. But there’s something left in my head. You are the one who set it up, now you’re the one to make it stop. I’m the one who’s feeling lost, right now.
Now you want me to forget, every little thing you said. But there is something left in my head. “I won’t forget, the way you’re kissing, The feeling’s so strong, were lasting for so long.” But I’m not the one, your heart is missing. That’s why you go away.
You were never satisfied, no matter how I tried (to get your feelings back), now you wanna say goodbye, to me. But there is something left in my head. “I won’t forget, the way you’re kissing, The feeling’s so strong, were lasting for so long.” But I’m not the one, your heart is missing. That’s why you go away.
Sitting here all alone, in the middle of nowhere. Don’t know which way to go. There’s ain’t so much to say now between us( caused you want me out of your life). “I won’t forget, the way you’re kissing, The feeling’s so strong, were lasting for so long.” But I’m not the one, your heart is missing. That’s why you go away. )
Would you, read the letter I gave, again? Would you think of me, when you are sad? Would you think of me, when you need somebody to talk to? Would you hope, I was still beside you, NOW?
Even till this day, I hadent have a good sleep, hadent eat properly, do my work properly, focus and have a real, good, happy feeling when I woke up, till I go to sleep. I still cry now and then when I thought of us. There's is also, not a time, my eyes were dry when I read your letter.
Would you recall, wad is our First mth msg, you sent to me?
"It's our first month dear! Time flies. It has been great being with you! You're always the one with me when I need you, comforting me when I'm down, sharing my agony, sorrows & joy, compromising me & showering me with your love. I know at times, I can be really annoying. Whining & worst still, mood swing. But you're always giving in to me. You're so nice dear! I know you love me cause I do Love you too. I do hope that we'll last long yeah? Muacks. :-* "
From the start of the year, I was really really down, and why I was able to pull on and through, is because of you. You gave me the motivation, the care, the concern and the love. Letting me feel that, there's you by my side, someone to share my problems with. Someone that is closest to me, someone that I will trust, share my secrets and life with. Without you, I perhaps, had already lead a zombie, aimless life.
Would you also remember, our first kiss? It was 16 Febuary. You said I was scared, and ps to kiss you. The first one landed on the side. Do you still remember the feeling on your lips now? Our french kiss? Our saliva that we licked on each others mouth? The smell is still in my mouth now. The passing of sweets? and our most longest kiss? Do you remember all these?
You also told me in msg that, "Dear, your shoulder is so comfortable", that was after I told you I couldnt really breathe, caused my shirt was tight. You also said, "Dear, your kiss is so addictive, how? :(:("
I replied, "oh, then control, control.. once or twice the most when we meet. If cant 'ta han' then kiss piglet first!! :) "
You said " Yay, dear you gave me your first kiss! :-* kiss you better than piglet. Hehe.
On my birthday, you are the first who wished me. I posted up on fb thanking you the first one too!
"Happy birthday my dear!!! B-) 17 alr so must be more mature ah! My apologies that i'm unable to celebrate it with you. But i'm glad we enjoyed ourselvess that day. :) I'll never forget that day cause it's the day we got really close! I like long bus trips with you dear!! Honestly speaking, i prefer you to my booster! HAHA. I'm so glad you're always with me to care for me when I'm down or whenever I'm not feeling well. I'll care for you too dear! I hope you're able to see my efforts. I luv you & I'm looking forward to seeing you! Ai ni. :-* :-* "
On our 2nd month tog, you said,
"Happy 3rd month dear! :) I'm so glad we're clsoer now. Tho I'm still quite shy when I'm with you. But its normal right? Thx for being with me when I needed you the most. You gave me the care & comfort I needed the most. You make me feel loved that I'm not alone. Dear, study harder okay! You promised me to get into poly so you must! Don't break your promise. I hope we'll get closer each day & I'm looking forward to our 6th month! Are you? :) Many many more months tog yup. I love you dear!! Muacks. :-)"
Yes, You changed alot alot for me when its out second month. I can really really feel and see it. I was touched by your efforts. Having a long term relationship is not easy. We need lots and lots of communication, love, care and trust. Many of my friends, or some who I told them the problems whenever we disagreed, discouraged me to break up with you. But, that was never NEVER on my mind. Because, I belived, as long as we still love, and feel for each other, there will be no problems that cant be solved.
I admitted that, I had been conrtolling you, resticting you too, too, too much. That you cant take it, and want freedom. You want to go out with your friends gathering. You want to spend time with your friends. You want to do things, which may spoilt your image. I tried, not to let you spoilt your image, care for your safety, health and many many things. Perhaps, my care, became a restiction. My care, became annoying. My care, had no effect on you.
Would you, also remember, how I hug you? And, my hands on your waist? You rested your legs on me, sat on me while i held you. How I protected you standing on bus, so you will not fall. How I applied plaster for you, and risked having HFMD. My friends all said, I'm thoughtful, buying things, sweets for you whenever I'm.
Would you remember one of our bus rides, when we were spoted by your sister's friend? You were like staring at her. That was really cute. The I Love You sweets? Was it nice? How I held your hands, at iluma? The way, the feeling, I fed you cakes? Drinks? Popcorns? Sharing the same straw, same fork? Would you?
A real loving couple, may not feel much for each other. Or talk much to each other. How you lost feelings for me, its normal. I really, really dont want to break up with you. I still want to be tog with you. Again.
I dont mind waiting for your feelings to come back to me. As long as you try, making me important to you again. We can forget all of the promises you made. You can go out with your friends, you can do wad you like. But,
Would you, TRY? TRY having feelings back for me again? I REALLY REALLY LOVE YOU. I want the both of us, calling, Dear, Darling again. I want you to lie on my shoulder again. I want to hold your waist again. I want to touch your lips, with tender and loving care. I want to pray for you when you are ill.. I NEED YOU..
WOULD YOU COME BACK TO LOVE ME.. AGAIN?
I had gave up blogging long time ago. This post is specially for you.. 我爱你..
